The Characters

The Principals

Anarcrow–A member of the Corvidae family. Recently broke the shackles of modernity only to realize there is nowhere else to go. The Greeks, it seemed, were right all along.

The Artist–Loves Alex Toth, loathes Rob Liefeld.

The Writer–Wants to be Evan Dorkin’s love child. Would accept a guest role as Harmony’s boyfriend in any upcoming Hectic Planet stories.

The Chorus

Adam Tan–Named after The Clash song, ‘Atom Tan’. He only speaks in Clash song titles (he wanted to speak via their lyrics, but copyright laws would most certainly punish him for his cleverness).

Janie Bones–A supermodel who tried to oust Adam Tan from securing his recurring role as the speaker of all things The Clash. After a steady diet of narcissism, sycophants and crackers, she has now taken a job as an understudy for The Cryptkeeper.

The Scientist–Primarily an ethologist, The Scientist comes in many shapes and sizes. He earned his requisite PhD in order to prove himself worthy of a highly specialized knowledge that rarely serves that which he studies. For this, The Scientist must often pay the ultimate price for his existence.

The Archrival–Though no human being could ever be considered Anarcrow’s archrival (as that would assume humans operate with the same ontological status of crows), through a peculiar set of less-than-original habits (primarily those surrounding fashionable environmentalism that only the elite can practice), The Archrival cannot help but incur the wrath of Anarcrow.

Birds of a Feather–From what we’re told, they often flock together. They tend to represent any and all cultural conformists, especially the so-called ‘individualists’. These kids are a hoot.

The Marauding Mennonite (AKA, Super-Mennonite!)–He’s everyone’s favorite pacifist superhero! He’s a fast runner and his kryptonite is saddle shoes and fists.

Lex Lutheran–Evil tyrant. Modelled after someone The Writer knows. Why? Because he can.

Roxanne Richie–A sassy burlesque dancer who overcomes evil (and good) by studying the work of Milo Manara and Lili St. Cyr. In times of great need, she will even pull from her arsenal of ‘Ten Poses’.

Poorly Drawn Man–Only appears when The Artist allows The Writer to draw. For good reason, he’s rarely seen.

DuckCommonly referred to as ugly, but is ambrosially cute. Despite his limited vocabulary, he is, quite possibly, one of the more clever and mysterious Anseriformes on the planet. After all, only female ducks ‘quack’, and, as shown in Establishing Identity, ‘he’ quacks. (Oh my.)

Everybody’s Favorite Messiah–That’s right. We have Jesus, Lao Tzu, Siddhartha, Baha’u’llah, Anne Lee, and George Clooney. “Still doin’ it for the kids!”